You’re in control of your thoughts

The most important lesson I’ve learned since I started studying happiness is this:

 I’m in charge of how I feel, and I choose happy.

Easier said than done, I know. But it’s true.

As Buddha said:

What we think, we become.

If you’re the sort of person who sees the bad in everything, who feels pessimistic, who sees the glass as half empty, who thinks “I can’t” instead of “I can and I will” … if you dread the bad, never look out for the good; then of course you will feel unhappy, low, depressed, and anxious. But you are not a victim! Whatever bad stuff you’re going through, you are not the only person going through it. Have a ‘victim moment’, if you like, but not a victim life. Things will get better. So start taking control of your thoughts.

Controlling how you think will change your life: it has mine.

I now see the beauty in small, every day things. When I hear sad news, I feel grateful and motivated to go out and live my life, rather than sad and sorrowful. I make a choice, every single day, to get up and take positive action to make things happen. I don’t think about the sad, the ugly, the mean haters, the utter horrible-ness of the world around me.

I think: millions of tiny microscopic moments had to line up so that I could even be born. I am here, and I’ve only got one life, and it’s darn well going to be a happy, fulfilling one!

A few tips for controlling your thoughts:

happy choice.jpg
  • When a negative thought enters your mind, notice it, and change the subject. Quick. This takes some practise, but you can do it!

  • Practise mindfulness and meditation; I find the Calm app really good.

  • Be kind and compassionate, always. You never know what someone else is going through.

  • That annoying person who drives you crazy; stop thinking about them!

  • Wherever you are, look for beauty, focus on the present moment. Is the sky a beautiful colour? Are there flowers, birds, or trees nearby? What can you appreciate in the here and now?

  • Concentrate on what you’re grateful for, not what you haven’t got (not just possessions, either, relationships, skills, a healthy body…)

Happiness is a choice!

I truly believe that. Choose happy. Choose a life worth living.

Think I’m full of crap?

I was once so depressed, I just wanted to curl up into a ball, and die. I couldn’t see any point to life, I couldn’t see why anyone would do anything, I found no pleasure in anything.

A combination of behavioural therapy, reading inspirational books and blogs, becoming mindful, and realising I can control my thoughts has changed all that.

I’m not saying it’s easy. I’m saying it’s possible.

Go. Be Happy.

Need some additional help? I run workshops, online courses and offer coaching to help people become the best version of them selves; a happy, fulfilled successful version. Find out more >

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Be Happier: 5 Thing you should stop, right now

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Overcoming Anxiety